So today I got a e-mail from my STBX and it is to date the most civil e-mail I've received since this whole thing started. He finally acknowledged that things can never be the way they were--something he's had real issues with. It was so nice to hear from him without the venom or trying to get me back. The tone was of the man I met all those years ago and I miss him but I'm glad that it happened now when I'm in a much stronger place than I was months ago. I think had I gotten this e-mail a few months ago I would have been putty in his hands. It was so great to hear that he respects me, I really think that we both lost that for eachother. We stopped seeing each other as whole people and began to view the other as a means to our individual happiness. We stopped talking and really listening and we never got that right. I know that I love him still and will probably always love him. He even wants to be friends which we both know will take a hell of a lot of work. In theory it sounds like the best option but I don't know if it's just lip service...either way it's not something that I'll be looking forward to anytime soon but maybe someday.
I feel like I'm finally getting a slice of the peace that I've wanted with what has happened with us...let's see how long this lasts.
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